I started to weep.
'Shut the fuck up!
I can't stand to hear a woman cry.
You can scream all you want.
Oh yes, please do;
But no fucking crying; you got it!'
Somehow I managed to stop.
Listened to the music on the radio.
There are songs I heard
That even still cannot listen to.
But there are some that comforted.
Midnight Oil:
'How can we dance when our earth is turning?
How can we sleep while our beds are burning?'
I should have been hungry;
We'd been on the road for hours.
There was no way I was hungry.
Midnight Oil wasn't monster music.
He turned the radio off.
Turned on his monster music.
Eminem rapped out loud:
'Cause I know you want me baby, I think I want you too
I think I love you baby, I think I love you too'
Monster decided he was hungry;
But not for food.
He stopped the car.
I couldn't hear the rain;
Still the wind.
He got out
And back in again.
I felt the draft when his door slammed shut.
He removed the blanket from my head.
The rain had turned into sleet.
At last, he was going to do it.
Then I'd be free.
'I can't wait.'
Beer & spearmint breath.
There was a cigarette loosely hanging
From the side of his mouth;
He took hold of it
And stubbed it out in my neck.
I screamed.
There was no one around to hear;
Just the monster and Eminem.
Monster glee-smiled.
Lit another cigarette.
Eminem continued to rap:
'But I do know one thing though, bitches, they come they go
Saturday through Sunday, Monday, Monday through Sunday yo.
Maybe I’ll love you one day, maybe we'll someday grow;
Till then just sit your drunk ass on that fuckin' runway ho...'
I think I screamed the way he liked.
The floorboard and blanket
Were a comfort afterwards.
The noise of the road too.
I didn't want to think about freedom anymore.
Didn't believe it would end with rape.
‘Like a clock whose hands are sweeping
Past the minutes of its face
And the world is like an apple
Whirling silently in space.’
~Bergman, Legrand
